The monster has been called a lot of names: โthe imposter syndrome,โ โthe lizard brain,โ โthe inner fraud.โ Itโs that voice inside your head undermining everything you do.
Youโre not good enoughโฆYou just got really luckyโฆThere are people far better and more qualified than youโฆ
Itโs been defined as, โfeelings ofย inadequacy that persist even in face of information that indicates thatย the opposite is true. It is experienced internally as chronicย self-doubt, and feelings of intellectual fraudulence.โ
There are a number of reasons why the negative voice exists:
- Maintaining the comfort zone.ย Self-critical thinking steers you away from the unknown and frightening tasks (even though you know growth comes from being stretched and stepping outside your comfort zone). Itโs a safety mechanismย with good intentions, but unproductive effects.
- Inherited behavior. Those who grew up with highly critical parents unknowingly mirror and internalize the negative talk they received.
- A warped coping mechanism. In highly sensitive individuals and people-pleasers, the fear of hearing criticism from others is, in a warped way, relieved when they give the criticism to themselves.
Here are five effective ways to master the monster inside your head:
1. Name it and externalize itย
Labeling and externalizing an inner-struggle allows for detachment. In The War of Art, Steven Pressfield called it โResistance.โ Others have used the metaphor of the โElephant and the Riderโ to refer toย the inner-conflict.
Whatever creative name you choose to apply, making the issueย foreign allows you toย see it objectively and out of alignment with who you desire to be. It keeps it โat a distanceโ so to speak, as youย work to separate further from itโs negative responses.
2. Reframe your competitionย
The imposter syndrome feeds off the comparison game.ย Regardless of what youโre involved in, youโll always encounter someone more skilled. If youโre not careful, that measuring game will haunt and stifleย everything you do.
Instead ofย seeing yourself paling in comparison, take an approach of progress and possibility.
The 24 people who broke the 4-minute mile within a year of Roger Bannister didnโt compare themselves and say theyโll never be good enough, but saw the opportunity to likewise succeed and exceed.
3. Honesty withย your abilities
Failing to reach high standards only reaffirms the voice of imposter that says, โsee, youโre not good enough.โ Yet, itโs not your efforts or the goal thatโs the problem, but the mismatch between the two.
High aspirations and standards for excellence are always encouraged, but you need the self-awareness and self-honesty of knowing your current level of skill in relation to the goal. Otherwise, youโll keep setting yourself up for disaster and feeding the imposter syndrome.
You may have the potential to play varsity, but donโt beat yourself up when you fall short as a freshman. Build momentum up to your big goals and balance them out with small achievable wins.
4. Leverage it
Use it as an ally. In the same way people suffering stage-fright boosted their performance when taught toย reframe their stress response as excitement and preparation.
Consider voices from the imposter syndrome as issuing a welcomed challenge. Like the tough-love from a coach or parent. The counter-intuitive acceptance of your inner-dialogue can be an effective alternative to constantly challenging it.
5. Own your achievements
In our efforts to be humble, we often ignore our achievements, and inadvertently feed the imposter syndrome with a pattern of discrediting behavior.
Nobody likes โtooting their own horn,โ but forget about public applause for your success, rather, work on personally acknowledgingย your strengths and accomplishments. Receive compliments graciously instead of passingย them off.
The imposter syndrome feeds off a low self-esteem. But thatโs overcomeย when rememberingย how competent you really are. Journaling is a great way to achieve that, it allows you to look back at your success, and thatย confidence will silence the inner-critic.